"Seriously? You thought you could mail a puppy to Georgia?"

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

I don’t listen to the radio since I discovered audio books, so I don’t know if ‘Knuckleheads in the News’ is still broadcast by Lannigan…if he’s still on the air, that is. Anyway, there was a perfect story for ‘Knuckleheads’ about a lady in Minneapolis who was trying to mail a puppy to a family member in Georgia for her birthday. She went to the Post Office with the puppy sealed in a box and told the employee to be careful with the package because it was very fragile. When some noise came from the box, she said it was a toy robot. At some point, the box was moving and a postal worker decided to have it opened, at which time the puppy was discovered. Air holes had been poked in the box, but then covered by the packaging tape…by who is unclear.

Later, when the lady was contacted about her intentions, she was uninterested in the fate of the puppy, but was anxious to get a refund of the $22 she’d spent to have it mailed and the money she’d put inside the puppy’s collar. The Post Office referred her to the police for the refund.

I’m wondering how this case will go when she steps in front of the judge.

“Over the years, I’ve had some people in front of me that have done some really dumb things…but this has to be the number one dumbest thing ever, Ms. Champion,” the judge said.

“Oh…well…thank you, your Honor. I always try to be the best,” Ms. Champion relied.

“No, no…it’s not a compliment. I’m saying putting a puppy in a box for two days without food or water and letting it be flown in a cargo hold where the temperature would reach 40 below was…well…a death sentence for that puppy. What were you thinking?”

“I’ve heard thinking was overrated…so I try not to do it so much. And what’s all the fuss? It was just a puppy and I think its okay now. What I’m wondering is…can I have my $22 back? Those lousy post office people never did mail the package, after all.”

“Well…sure you can. I’m going to have the refund waiting for you in the Georgia airport. We’re going to box you up, stick you on a plane, and send you there to get it. How’s that suit you?”

They can’t really do that…but it would be nice.

I’d rather move two feet of snow than to have to deal with the ice/slush frozen on my driveway. I chiseled at it for about an hour and managed to clean the bottom five feet of the drive before giving in. I headed to the Metropark with Dakota where the hiking was the toughest its been all winter. We were breaking through about a two-inch layer of crust that had formed over the snow, making every step a struggle. Dakota figured out it would be better to walk in my footsteps and I tried to walk in the prints I’d made the day before. We were so noisy with each step, that the deer were long gone before our arrival. When we arrived at the marsh and were preparing to cross the stream that feeds it, we discovered it was about four feet wide and moving fast…something neither of us had counted on and one of us would have trouble with…me. I managed to find a spot where I could jump and only submerse one foot…which I did in some really icy water. Dakota cleared it easily. Showoff.

I think there’s still more snow coming and with the current condition of the trails, believe it will be a few days before I’ll be running them again.

Hike duration: 75 minutes.
Training Heart Rate: 90.
Calories burned during workout: 375.