Farm emergencies and Willoughby's Christmas lights...

Thursday, December 3, 2015
"Hey John...I kinda have another emergency situation and it's kinda exactly like the one from yesterday," Jinene said.
I was in the middle of pulling apart a dishwasher and trying to find out why it wasn't draining.  I didn't really want to work in that crap, so I was game.
"You need another stall divided," I said.
"I need another stall divided," she confirmed, "and it has to be done today."
It was a little past noon and that meant a couple of things.
"We don't have any wood for the wall since I used all the crappy stuff on Dillon's and threw out the pieces that were too short, so I'll have to drive to Middlefield to get fourteen 12-foot boards," I said.  "And what's worse is I'll be forced to miss the staff meeting," I said with a sly grin.  She returned the grin knowing she'd just done me a favor.
There was no way to get it done before quitting time and I'd need a second set of hands, which I didn't have.  Jinene called Justin and asked him if he had the time to run down and help me as I left for the lumber yard.  The item is common and always on hand at Carter Lumber in Middlefield, the center of one of the largest Amish communities in the world.  It is commonly used to divide horse stalls and the Amish aren't the only ones with horses in the region.  I have been told and don't doubt that Geauga County has the second largest ratio of horses to people in the country.  Fieldstone does it's share with 36.  They had the wood and after going through about twenty boards, I found the 14 that suited me.
Justin had the stall cleaned out and ready when I returned.  I backed the truck up close to the stall, got out my tools, measured the first board and cut it to fit.  We walked it into the stall and tried to insert it into the groove.
"It's too tight," Justin said in exasperation.
And it was.  The wood was treated and probably slightly swollen making it a hair too tight.  My brain was racing for a way to fix the situation quickly since we needed to get the horses back in their stalls.
"Bring that thing out here.  I'm going to give it a shave with my circular," I said.
Justin didn't follow my thinking, but knew I was the brains of the outfit so he followed my lead.  He placed the board across the two five-gallon buckets I'd set up as saw horses and sat on the middle to hold it steady.  I put a cut along the width of the board an inch from the end then, approaching it from the end and holding the circular horizontal to the board, cut carefully into the cut I'd already placed.  An eighth-inch sliver fell away.  I repeated the cut on the other end.  "Try that for size," I said.
He walked it in the stall and called back, "fits like a glove."  We had a system.
We spent the next hour cutting and inserting all fourteen boards though half way through one of the ladies came from the office to ask for some help.  "Um...will you have time to set the tables and chairs up for the board meeting?  We need it by four."
I looked to Justin who was rolling his eyes and back to her.  "This is going to take another hour and it's three now.  Kind of an emergency situation so I don't really know what to tell you.  I'll go as fast as I can," I said.  She read my meaning and went and gathered several other ladies and they did it themselves.
To Jinene's delight, we finished before four and the horses were brought in.  I headed for home, took a shower and drove to downtown Willoughby for the festive lighting ceremony of the city streets and town square/triangle.  I was meeting with Bob and my sister.  He and I were going to cruise chicks while waiting for her.  We're both single and foolish and figured it would be a good idea.  Actually, I'd told Bob that I attract beautiful women like metal shavings to a magnet and that since I wasn't interested, I'd introduce them to him and maybe he could find someone.  "You're such a 'Don Juan'," he'd said.  Well...damned right I am.
There was probably 10,000 people standing in the streets of downtown listening to the high school band and choir performing Christmas favorites.  We listened and talked and shivered.  Finally, I suggested we go to one of the eateries for some chow.
"Everyone is standing in the street.  There's probably plenty of room in the restaurants," I said.
Wrong.  We elbowed our way into an empty table and got menus.  I was eating with my nutritionist so there would be no cheating.  I read over the menu and made a quick selection.  The waiter came by to take the order, but Bob wasn't ready.  "There's ten items on it, Bob, what the hell's taking you so long?" I said, commenting that it was like being out with a woman - which got a look from the woman at the next table.  He forced the waiter to leave and return and then ordered a salad.
"Seriously?  You took all that time and then ordered green shit and dressing?"
Cecilia joined us and when the bill came, I took one look and realized I couldn't read it.  I nudged the girl sitting near me at the next table and asked her to use her young eyes and tell me the amount, which she did gladly.
"And I'm on a gluten-free diet and you and your friends are killing me with that pizza!" I said, indicating the delicious looking and smelling, multi-deck affair they had on a turntable in the middle of their table.  They laughed that 'you're a funny old man' laugh and then we headed out.
We walked some on the streets and square and then back to Bob's place, but it was a workout-free day, though quite active.  My pants are getting quite loose as I move through day five of the new diet, and that's good.  Hay delivery tomorrow, so no matter what else happens, I'll burn some major calories.